Posts Tagged Eminem

Hot Jamz: A Guest Post by Mark B.

Music notes

Jessie J – Nobody’s Perfect
Talk about understanding pain – Jessie J had a stroke at the age of 18 and now she can’t drink, smoke or do drugz…and isn’t that the real tragedy? Jessie conveys the anguish of guilt with ease in this ballad, which seems odd for someone born in the 90s, but it works. I will say, however, that in her line “I should have kept it between us, but now I went and told the whole world how I was feeling” she basically rips off Karen Smith’s apology to Gretchen Wieners: “I’m sorry I laughed at you that time you got diarrhea at Barnes and Nobles…and I’m sorry for telling everyone about it…And I’m sorry for repeating it now.” Jessie J can’t really be blamed, though – if she’s anything like my grandma after her stroke, she probably forgot she ever saw Mean Girls.

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Leona Lewis – Collide
While some people may hate on the British LL (winner of the 3rd Season of the X Factor) for completely ripping off Avicii’s 2010 jam “Penguin”­ – previously featured on this very site – I am a sucker for a commanding female voice cushioned by a simple, elegant beat. I don’t care that she “samples” from “Penguin” or her more blatant rip off of Dave Matthew’s line, “Crash into me.” If you can put aside your judge-y face (look away! look away!), you’ve got a great song to run to, complete with a crescendo that makes you wanna throw out your jazz hands. Just be careful not to get so distracted by the orgasm in your ears that you end up crashing into a car.

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Bad Meets Evil – Lighters (Feat. Bruno Mars, Eminem, and Royce)
Bruno Mars is the Arlington of the music world. He’s fine, I suppose…he gives white people a safe venture into hip hop, allowing them to go just far enough to say, “Hey, I’ve done the whole urban thing, and I am A-OK here in Virginia pop.” In reality, they never even crossed the bridge. For some reason Eminem decided to grace Mr. Mars with the intro and refrain for one of the former Slim Shady’s best raps to date. I don’t claim to be an expert in the field, but this song manages to convey Eminem’s passion without crossing into his trademark screaming. It makes me want to learn how to rap-dance (hold my crotch and bounce up and down), unlike most of his songs, which make me want to call social services for Hailie. And how can you not love a song where Royce manages to fit in the line “You goin down on something you don’t want to see…like a hairy box.” Wow. Time to get back to the suburbs.

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David Guetta – Titanium (feat. Sia)
Is there anything David Guetta can’t do? Aside from open heart surgery? The intro to this jam could be the beginning of a John Hughes film but in no time we are brought into to the Queer as Folk genre Mr. Guetta has mastered. I don’t doubt that for inspiration, Guetta sits in his studio imagining gay men bouncing around a circuit party when he creates these hits. Thank you, sir. Thank you. Also, little known fact: Titanium is an element on the periodic chart. Sia is not, because she is off the charts. I did go there.

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Self Expression by M.B.

MBescher


Arriving as angst-ridden teenager living in an all male dorm at a Catholic college, I was dealing with a lot of Dawson’s Creek emotions. It was tough to find an adequate outlet that befit my surroundings – it didn’t seem like the group I found myself in didn’t talk too much about personal things. I didn’t want to eat my feelings. Poetry was out. I can’t paint, draw or color within the lines. I don’t know what playing a sport actually feels like aside from the shame it tends to inflict on me. After some time with my new friends, I discovered that boys from the mid-west who play lacrosse (it’s not just a Buick) and vote the wrong way channel their feelings through bands like Bayside. “Trying to win approval from people that I don’t know. I look so strong when the weight of all the world don’t take its toll. I’d choose my side if I believed in what was right, but I’m all wrong.” Drinking Natty Light and playing Mario Kart with the guys while listening to Bayside, the Samples, and DMB helped me understand that they feel as vulnerable and insecure as the rest of us, they just work through it differently. If nothing else, Bayside saved me from obesity.
mp3 download:Bayside – They Looked Like Strong Hands (Acoustic Version)

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Spoon is generally either a utensil I use to eat cereal or an action to keep me warm post-coitus. But it can do so much more when it comes in the form of a band. “Don’t Make Me a Target” lends itself to bouncing up and down, drenched in sweat and whatever well drink has spilled on you in the middle of the 9:30 Club. It lets you merge with the crowd and go completely counter-culture: to be ok with not being an individual. There are times when you want to avoid interacting with people, places, and things with you at the center without hoping someone will notice you’re down and out. Don’t Make Me a Target: to blend out of the scene – without being considered uninterested, haughty, sullen or full of self-pity. No one is special all of the time.
mp3 download:Spoon – Don’t Make Me a Target

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When dancing, I am usually incapable of finding the beat or following the rhythm – which is too bad, because I love to dance. “The Longest Road” is one of those songs whose greatness lies in a steady beat, a feat most sailors long for (offensive). This dance number doesn’t get fancy (which is generally when I start to second guess myself and start dancing like an adderall-ridden ferret) but keeps the listener engaged in its simplicity. That simplicity offers me the chance to express myself without letting on that were another beat layered in, people might assume I were having a seizure on the dance floor.
mp3 download:Morgan Page – The Longest Road (Deadmou5 Remix Radio Edit)

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Lil Wayne is a lyrical genius. I’m serious. While this song isn’t the best example of his abilities as a wordsmith, it fits in with the theme of this post: how we express ourselves varies as much as Snookie’s tan. “I pick the world up and I’m a drop it on your fuckin’ head.” Don’t we all feel like that sometimes? It can be scary stuff when it’s coming from a guy whose entire body is covered in tattoos. Even his eyelids. While should never actually pick the world up (even a globe, most of those are made with very thick material) and bash it on someone, this is a great song to run to; it’s full bodied, it’s raw and, most of all, it’s angry.
mp3 download:Lil Wayne – Drop The World (feat. Eminem)

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Beck. Beck is the warden of a jail. He displays rectitude in his structured beats while managing chaos inside. It’s a gift people are learning is essential to daily life. “Time Bomb” has the cheery makings of a pop song but is more disturbing than Kate Gosselin’s hair (though nowhere near as offensive or disturbing). “I got a time bomb. I got a time bomb. na na na na” sounds like something your primary school gym teacher would chant while trying to get you to play dodgeball (also disturbing) without realizing what he’s singing. But what “Time Bomb” represents is that whether you harp melodically to acoustic, blend in without motive, shake it out or run it off – we’ve all got to find a way to work through our shit. Na na na na.
mp3 download:Beck – Time Bomb

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Thank you M.B. for doing the C&B guest post this week…great songs! If anyone has some songs or a theme they’d like to share with the world let me know, guest posts are always welcome!





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